INTJ For a Day
After taking loads of personality tests, I've been "diagnosed" as an INTJ personality. What does that mean? Well for one, it means I'm fairly screwed in the dating/romantic relationship department. But if you really want to learn more about it, here are some easy to understand resources:
https://www.16personalities.com/intj-personality
https://introvertdear.com/news/7-secrets-about-dating-an-intj/ (this article nearly summarizes my life in a nutshell. With all relationships, not limited to romantic.)
Now here's where it gets personal. INTJ's are incredibly introverted. I've been an introvert since as far back as I can remember. Throughout my life, my parents have always said things like "why don't you go hang out with friends?" etc. Of course, I enjoy spending time with friends here and there, but it's not my natural instinct or go to. Small doses. I absolutely hate spending time with large groups of friends doing activities. People are most enjoyable one on one or in groups of no more than 3 (not including me). Time spent alone is thoroughly enjoyed. Social situations are battery draining. I can spend a night with friends, and need a week or so to recharge before I have any desire to be particularly social again. I can go weeks, even months without ever wanting to talk to anyone period. However, I have trained myself to be friendly and open socially in most situations (still a work in progress though). We're also very emotionally closed off. Logic over feelings every time. The brutal truth is what we like best. I'm never offended when someone tells it like it is, in fact, it typically sends me into a brainstorming of what to do better.
J for judgmental. The more I'm honest with myself, I am very judgmental. Not so much about a person at large, but rather their choices. Stupid, cheesy, immature behavior kills any chance of developing friendship and especially romantic interest on my end. Music is probably one of the places where I'm most judgmental. I either like the musician or absolutely hate them. There's very little in between. Luckily, I have also deliberately trained myself to tune out music that I hate. Sadly most places that play music these days play bloody terrible stuff. To give you an example: in my bus, when I was attaching some wiring for new speakers a few years back, I completely disabled the radio function of my stereo because I hate the radio. I'm slightly less extreme now, but only slightly. Judgmental has a very negative connotation in our society, but another part of being judgmental is really observation. Curiosity in how people behave; wanting to figure out why they do what they do and so on. Also, judgment is necessary for reasoning and weighing situations and outcomes. If given the time, you can bet I'll play most possible outcomes of a situation out in my head first. That's partially why I'm very good at going with the flow, because I've often already thought about that path, so it's not really going with the flow. Of course, I do get terribly bored sometimes and want a random adventure.
If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. That's practically a mantra for me. If I care about it enough, I'll find a way to get it done. Unless I really don't know how then I'll find a way to find someone who can help or teach me how to get it done. I've debated becoming a computer programmer, solely because I find so many things in websites and programs poorly designed and not as smooth as they should be. Though I don't really have much interest in computer science, it's just my "get it done right" mentality that drives me to contemplation of such ideas.
The biggest blessing and curse of INTJ-ness is thinking. Always thinking, always analyzing. Even whilst writing this, I'm thinking about a thousand different things. It's easy to get on a train of thought, go straight down the rabbit hole and get lost in thought for hours on end. So in a sense, I'm easily entertained. I can often spend hours literally staring at a blank wall (yes I've done it many times) cause I get lost in thought. My imagination and mental imagery are pretty good though. With every art piece I've ever done, I imagine the entire thing out in my head. Usually many times over. Which is bad, cause I can see it so vividly I often don't have a desire to actually make it. Almost feels as though I've already made it. I usually don't speak my mind in most setting, cause most people don't like brutal honesty; plus I often come up with mischievous ideas that often get others into trouble cause they think it's a good idea after I tell them. The question "What are you thinking about?" is a can of worms. Don't ask it unless you really really want to know. Another downside is that it's nearly impossible to fall asleep most nights. As soon as my head hits the pillow, the brain fires up and keeps me awake. I often have most of my best ideas when I'm trying to get to sleep though. Thus I keep a notebook next to my bed and have mastered writing out full sentences, even paragraphs in the dark, though unable to actually see the paper. I've been getting rather good at it lately. I can write almost perfectly within the lines while not having any idea where they are, to begin with. Truth be told, I literally have to think to myself "Stop thinking, you need to sleep". Then I have to concentrate on not thinking until I can drift off to sleep. Frequently I'll have ideas, or questions in my sleep that will wake me and I can't get back to sleep until I've solved them, written them down, or convinced myself to stop thinking again. I like to think about issues from as many angles as I can; put myself in other's shoes. Thus I have only a handful of opinions I'm very strong about, as I'm always open to rethinking and changing, provided I'm given a good argument.
There is rhyme and reason behind nearly every action I do. For example: any time I drive anywhere I visualize my route and debate what will be the easiest and most convenient way to get there. Driving to the store I will think of ways to avoid left turns on busy streets, and so on. Maybe I'd make a good criminal. Or at least getaway driver? Everything must be planned to an extent. Sounds rigid, but I also plan time to be spontaneous into schedules too. Though last minute social plans sprung on me are almost 100% likely to get turned down. I have to know a few days in advance, or it disturbs the whole schedule I've made up for myself. So if you want to spend time, it's got to be planned in advance!
I'm very self-motivated when I get an idea I truly believe in though. Stubborn as can be, If I'm in, I'm all in. More than almost anything I enjoy learning. I wish my memory were better. What I'd give for a photographic one! However, I hate homework. I wouldn't call myself a good student. I never spend more than an hour or so studying for tests or whatnot, I'm just smart enough to get by and get good grades without trying too hard. But homework kills me. It distracts me from all the other things I wish I were studying. Plus someone forcing you to study something is not a very fun way to learn, nor is it good for retaining. Luckily I tend to procrastinate my procrastination rather well. Thus throughout my college career, I complete nearly every assignment at least a week early. Sometimes even up to a month before it's due. Get it done, out of the way, and go back to studying what I want. Documentaries and autobiographies are some of my true loves.
Perhaps you're now thinking that I'm a whack or an OCD maniac. But I'm not really either... I don't think. For better or worse, that's just how I'm wired. Sounds kind of like a depressing lonely life maybe, but it really isn't from my point of view. And there you have a little glimpse into my brain.
https://www.16personalities.com/intj-personality
https://introvertdear.com/news/7-secrets-about-dating-an-intj/ (this article nearly summarizes my life in a nutshell. With all relationships, not limited to romantic.)
Now here's where it gets personal. INTJ's are incredibly introverted. I've been an introvert since as far back as I can remember. Throughout my life, my parents have always said things like "why don't you go hang out with friends?" etc. Of course, I enjoy spending time with friends here and there, but it's not my natural instinct or go to. Small doses. I absolutely hate spending time with large groups of friends doing activities. People are most enjoyable one on one or in groups of no more than 3 (not including me). Time spent alone is thoroughly enjoyed. Social situations are battery draining. I can spend a night with friends, and need a week or so to recharge before I have any desire to be particularly social again. I can go weeks, even months without ever wanting to talk to anyone period. However, I have trained myself to be friendly and open socially in most situations (still a work in progress though). We're also very emotionally closed off. Logic over feelings every time. The brutal truth is what we like best. I'm never offended when someone tells it like it is, in fact, it typically sends me into a brainstorming of what to do better.
J for judgmental. The more I'm honest with myself, I am very judgmental. Not so much about a person at large, but rather their choices. Stupid, cheesy, immature behavior kills any chance of developing friendship and especially romantic interest on my end. Music is probably one of the places where I'm most judgmental. I either like the musician or absolutely hate them. There's very little in between. Luckily, I have also deliberately trained myself to tune out music that I hate. Sadly most places that play music these days play bloody terrible stuff. To give you an example: in my bus, when I was attaching some wiring for new speakers a few years back, I completely disabled the radio function of my stereo because I hate the radio. I'm slightly less extreme now, but only slightly. Judgmental has a very negative connotation in our society, but another part of being judgmental is really observation. Curiosity in how people behave; wanting to figure out why they do what they do and so on. Also, judgment is necessary for reasoning and weighing situations and outcomes. If given the time, you can bet I'll play most possible outcomes of a situation out in my head first. That's partially why I'm very good at going with the flow, because I've often already thought about that path, so it's not really going with the flow. Of course, I do get terribly bored sometimes and want a random adventure.
If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. That's practically a mantra for me. If I care about it enough, I'll find a way to get it done. Unless I really don't know how then I'll find a way to find someone who can help or teach me how to get it done. I've debated becoming a computer programmer, solely because I find so many things in websites and programs poorly designed and not as smooth as they should be. Though I don't really have much interest in computer science, it's just my "get it done right" mentality that drives me to contemplation of such ideas.
The biggest blessing and curse of INTJ-ness is thinking. Always thinking, always analyzing. Even whilst writing this, I'm thinking about a thousand different things. It's easy to get on a train of thought, go straight down the rabbit hole and get lost in thought for hours on end. So in a sense, I'm easily entertained. I can often spend hours literally staring at a blank wall (yes I've done it many times) cause I get lost in thought. My imagination and mental imagery are pretty good though. With every art piece I've ever done, I imagine the entire thing out in my head. Usually many times over. Which is bad, cause I can see it so vividly I often don't have a desire to actually make it. Almost feels as though I've already made it. I usually don't speak my mind in most setting, cause most people don't like brutal honesty; plus I often come up with mischievous ideas that often get others into trouble cause they think it's a good idea after I tell them. The question "What are you thinking about?" is a can of worms. Don't ask it unless you really really want to know. Another downside is that it's nearly impossible to fall asleep most nights. As soon as my head hits the pillow, the brain fires up and keeps me awake. I often have most of my best ideas when I'm trying to get to sleep though. Thus I keep a notebook next to my bed and have mastered writing out full sentences, even paragraphs in the dark, though unable to actually see the paper. I've been getting rather good at it lately. I can write almost perfectly within the lines while not having any idea where they are, to begin with. Truth be told, I literally have to think to myself "Stop thinking, you need to sleep". Then I have to concentrate on not thinking until I can drift off to sleep. Frequently I'll have ideas, or questions in my sleep that will wake me and I can't get back to sleep until I've solved them, written them down, or convinced myself to stop thinking again. I like to think about issues from as many angles as I can; put myself in other's shoes. Thus I have only a handful of opinions I'm very strong about, as I'm always open to rethinking and changing, provided I'm given a good argument.
There is rhyme and reason behind nearly every action I do. For example: any time I drive anywhere I visualize my route and debate what will be the easiest and most convenient way to get there. Driving to the store I will think of ways to avoid left turns on busy streets, and so on. Maybe I'd make a good criminal. Or at least getaway driver? Everything must be planned to an extent. Sounds rigid, but I also plan time to be spontaneous into schedules too. Though last minute social plans sprung on me are almost 100% likely to get turned down. I have to know a few days in advance, or it disturbs the whole schedule I've made up for myself. So if you want to spend time, it's got to be planned in advance!
I'm very self-motivated when I get an idea I truly believe in though. Stubborn as can be, If I'm in, I'm all in. More than almost anything I enjoy learning. I wish my memory were better. What I'd give for a photographic one! However, I hate homework. I wouldn't call myself a good student. I never spend more than an hour or so studying for tests or whatnot, I'm just smart enough to get by and get good grades without trying too hard. But homework kills me. It distracts me from all the other things I wish I were studying. Plus someone forcing you to study something is not a very fun way to learn, nor is it good for retaining. Luckily I tend to procrastinate my procrastination rather well. Thus throughout my college career, I complete nearly every assignment at least a week early. Sometimes even up to a month before it's due. Get it done, out of the way, and go back to studying what I want. Documentaries and autobiographies are some of my true loves.
Perhaps you're now thinking that I'm a whack or an OCD maniac. But I'm not really either... I don't think. For better or worse, that's just how I'm wired. Sounds kind of like a depressing lonely life maybe, but it really isn't from my point of view. And there you have a little glimpse into my brain.
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